Silence

 "Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls."

Matthew 11

St Beunos Jesuit Spirituality Centre in North Wales, one of my favourite retreat places has just brought out a couple of videos. Here's one: The Silence and the Light, (tech gremlins won't let me post the film for some reason) and a second, very helpful meditation on The Examen.

Sharing Silence

There are such treasures out there!  Here's another wonderful resource for anybody who's pondering whether to take the plunge into silence: Chris of this fragile tent's reflections on a recent 8 Day retreat at St Beunos Spirituality Centre.

Anagram

 Did you know that Silent is an anagram of Listen?

Technology and social media. Are you listening to me?

image credit: freedigitalphotos.net.renjithkhrishnan

A big thank you to Tractorgirl for drawing my attention to another thought-provoking and challenging TED talk.  Sociologist Sherry Turkle's Connected, but alone? reflects on whether our  increasing use of digital technology and social media, designed as a means of connection, is, paradoxically  hindering authentic and genuine communication with each other.  From Ms Turkle's own site:

Technology promises to let us do anything from anywhere with anyone. But it also drains us as we try to do everything everywhere. We begin to feel overwhelmed and depleted by the lives technology makes possible. We may be free to work from anywhere, but we are also prone to being lonely everywhere. In a surprising twist, relentless connection leads to a new solitude. We turn to new technology to fill the void,but as technology ramps up, our emotional lives ramp down.

Now I'm not one for knocking modern technology; I'm in agreement with many folk, Tractorgirl included, that social and digital media has been a wonderful means of enlarging my horizons beyond my own little corner, and yes, I've also made connections with people online that have later matured into   friendships 'in real life.' The plus side's been covered pretty well elsewhere and I'm not intending to add to that here.

No, what really caught my attention were the assertions of the effect our use of  the media is having on our ability to  just 'be,' by ourselves, alone; to give ourselves space; above all to give that 'safe'  space to others where they're truly heard and accepted. We are, Ms Turkle says, increasingly unable to listen, really listen to each other.

“If we're not able to be alone, we're going to be more lonely. And if we don't teach our children to be alone, they're only going to know how to be lonely.”

“We all really need to listen to each other, including to the boring bits.”

“The feeling that ‘no one is listening to me’ make us want to spend time with machines that seem to care about us.”

(Well, sorry, but if people think that when I'm old and grey I'll satisfy my social, emotional and spiritual needs by talking to a robot, they've another think coming! )

'No one is listening to me.'  That shocked me. Sadly, it didn't surprise me in the least.  I guess I've a vested interest; being involved in spiritual direction where listening skills are key.  As they are in so many of the helping professions.

So where does that leave us?  For myself, it's a timely reminder - if I needed one - of the need that is out there. And for anyone- I'd suggest, take a step,  doesn't need to be a huge project, just a small step will do, to once in a while switch off the laptop/phone/insert device of your choice.  Then call a friend (oops - alright, I'll let you have the phone back as long as you promise not to text or tweet). Speak to that elderly neighbour; the person next to you on the train, in the bus queue, the chap at the supermarket till, the elderly lady walking her dog in the park. And do it with no other agenda other than to offer the other person that precious gift of unhurried  time and space.

The Sound of Silence

As anybody who's familiar with my old Greenpatches blog will know, I'm no stranger to retreats. Silence and solitude have played a major part in my faith journey for a long time  now; it comes naturally to me and I sometimes need to remind myself that not everybody relates to God in the same way. The memories of that first  course over ten years ago when we were (gulp!) asked to spend 15 minutes in silent prayer seem very hazy  indeed.

I do love to hear about other people's experiences as they discover this marvellous gift for themselves though, so was delighted to stumble across Tim of  Nomad Podcast's reflections on a five -day retreat and his interview with Ruth Holgate of Loyola Hall Spirituality Centre. UK readers may remember her as one of the directors on The Big Silence documentary, filmed at St Beunos.

So, if  you're wondering what this practice of silence and retreat is all about and whether it's for you, you might find both of these resources help answer your questions.